The 5 wounds that prevent you from being yourself. By Lise Bourbeau. Chronicle by France Missud
🍃 Take off the masks! 🍃
For this first column (from me at least) on the blog À La Menthe Music , I'm going to tell you about a book that changed my life. Just that.
Let me give you the background:
At the start of summer 2021, after a social burnout (yes, yes, it exists) and a difficult breakup, I leave Paris and settle in with my sister in Nîmes. I am trying to understand things about myself, I am refocusing. I spend my days playing sports, reading self-help books, trying my hand at meditation, and even close to replacing my daily Coke with soy milk. In short, I am becoming a thirty-something perched in search of well-being and spirituality .
An after- noon, I'm going for a drink with a friend passing by. She's calm and collected, that's exactly what I need. She comes accompanied by a couple of friends. They are life coaches. It's about soul purification, reincarnation, energy and the search for your inner self . Two months earlier I would have spat out my squeezed orange (which would have been Coke by the way), giggling like an idiot. Now I am listening carefully. I tell them in turn my life, what I just went through and my desire to control everything. The couple exchange a glance then a knowing laugh and I hear:
"Yeah, it must be betrayal." I watch them puzzled. "What are the two of them making fun of me here? And most importantly, what are they talking about?" They whisper things to each other for fifteen or twenty seconds (my friend has a knowing smile, as if she understood everything), then the girl pulls me out: "Okay, girl, you have to read The 5 injuries that prevent you from being yourself of Lise Bourbeau. It will change your life."
Never heard of it.
Evening- I even order it on Amazon (the laziness of making the trip to the bookstore, that scourge).
This book, when you have it in your hands, you sometimes want to p deceive, sometimes want to laugh, but, above all, often want to throw it out the window because it feels weird to recognize each other (they warned me).
The author, Lise Bourbeau , native of Quebec and psychiatrist by profession, rose in the years 80 a center for personal development . She receives thousands of patients there and ends up, through listening and analysis, categorizing humans into five types of personalities (which she calls "mask") with which she associates five childhood wounds . It would be these wounds that would have made us what we are today. That is to say unhappy and tortured adults.
Me who thought I was unique, I don't think I will like it.
Very quickly, at the beginning of the book, Lise Bourbeau reveals to us that our soul would have come to earth in order to save the line of the same sex than ours (so, if you're a girl, it's your mother, your grandmother and even your ancestor Gertrude, who died three hundred and fifty-two years ago. . The rescue would pass first by our rescue to ourselves, that is to say by the deconstruction of our defense mechanisms. And she will help us do it. Put on your masks guys, it's time to discover yourself and then improve yourself in order to achieve plenitude, happiness and all the things that we slackers have time to dream about.
Even if the author warns: it is not a science (but a report of the observations that she was able to make during her long career ), for me who had just started to adhere to the hippie philosophy after years of thinking contemptuously and rationally, it was quite difficult to swallow, I immediately wanted to close the book, a smirk on his lips. But, remembering the good advice of the two coaches, I persevered. And I did well!
Lise Bourbeau, in summary of these five types of masks - that we would all wear - explains that our functioning, our bad habits, our failures etc ... would actually be due to injuries that we would have experienced from the period of our conception to that of the beginning of the age of reason (seven years approximately) and that we would not have digested. We would try, since, (doing anything, therefore) to protect ourselves with these shells so as not to relive the same wounds as in the past .
These five types of personality would, according to her, be recognizable in the character of said human being, in his gaze, his diet, his phobias, but also, more surprisingly, in the form of his body and even in his illnesses. I reassure the most down-to-earth of you: thereafter, she finally tells us little about souls and other reincarnations.
Here is the table of 5 injuries associated with their masks :
INJURIES < / b>
Come on, I want to start believing it. 🍃
In the description of the first personality I recognized the attitudes of relatives, their habits, and even some of their physical features. "Hey, it looks like my ex, there. Hey, but, he was doing that too. It's funny, it matches his physique quite a bit. Would it come from there suddenly? Oh, but that would explain a lot of things, say so! " The 5 injuries that prevent you from being yourself < / span> begins to intrigue me more and more. It is true that she is strong in analysis Lise Bourbeau . She describes the human psyche very well, its functioning and its problems. I also recognize myself here and there and I note my similarities on the page, as I had been advised to do. In case I end up believing it completely. feel like it.
It seems that we can have several injuries but that it is very rare to having them all five. Until halfway through the book I recognize myself all over the place, but never really anywhere. That doesn't prevent me from getting angry when I find myself in behaviors that I find pathetic. must face the facts I do have certain traits . What if they were due to unacknowledged injuries? I continue reading more and more carefully before getting carried away by fatigue.
The next day, while I start a new chapter, a personality strongly resembles me and then a second in an even more striking way. And there is the long awaited revelation! And yet the word is weak compared to what I felt when I recognized myself: astonishment is the most accurate term. I have the impression of being exposed, that one reads in me as in an open book, that one violates my intimacy.
Everything corresponds: my character, my attitude, my habits, my diet, my physique and even more bewildering, my most frequent illnesses ... So I'm not the only one to be like that? I have the same rotten mechanisms that more or less a fifth of the population? I am not unique, I do not suffer more than the others? Would I just be more drama-queen? I can tell you it took me down a floor or two. It was the start of labor. Definitely, she's a pro Lise Bourbeau.
If I had kept a bit of skepticism until I came across my personality type, it's well the illnesses and the physique which have finished convincing me. To succeed in correlating my personality with my physique and my illnesses, it is either that she is mega gifted in psychology, or that she is a high Voodoo priestess. In any case, I really want to believe in associated injuries , to look at them carefully and listen to his wise advice to get rid of all this! Which she does in the last part of the book, with such an optimistic and benevolent tone that it would almost make you move mountains. Or to explore the depths of your soul. And now, several months after starting my work, I can tell you that it works: these injuries did indeed exist as well as their mask and it feels crazy to accept them , to learn to identify them and understand them, then try to get rid of them.
I feel so light since then that I want to to share this joy - which is to meet again - with the whole world. I spend my life recommending my reading to everyone around me and even to strangers. So that deserved to be the first topic of my column . No ? I could not be more than happy to have convinced you to go buy it, borrow it or even steal it to read it, but I must warn you all the same: this book, you must be ready before opening it , at the risk of throwing him at the stake otherwise. You must have already started to do work on yourself , have opened your mind , and have learned to listen . But when it does, it is an invaluable aid in this great and long journey that is the search for your true self. I highly recommend it!
🌿 And what do you think? Have you read it? Has it changed your life too?